Living our dreams

I have been around the world and met a lot of people from all walks of life, all over the world and I have come to a realization, most people simply dream their dreams, very few actually work to turn them into a reality, and a time comes when we lose touch with our dreams or feel that our dreams are impossible and once we do that we resign to fate and start living a life thats just ok instead of one that we might love.

Politics or Family Business ?

Although Pakistan can still be considered a young country, and people can and do claim that we need some time to adopt a true democratic system which will take everything into account and be perfect for the betternment of the country, Pakistan has yet to take a single step on the highway of democracy.

In its short 60 year history, Pakistan has been ruled by either the strong military or one of the few ruling families who control Pakistan's few political parties. How can these political parties claim that they are the beacons of democracy when the parties themselves have no democatic principles guiding them. Out of Pakistan's 3 biggest political parties, Pakistan Peoples Party, Pakistan Muslim League and MQM, 2 (PPP, PML) are directly controlled by 2 families with no room for anyone else to take the helms and the 3rd MQM is in the firm grip of Altaf Hussain who sits in exile in the UK and yet can get his popular party leaders in Pakistan to follow his every command.

Pakistan People's Part is in the lime light these days since the assasination of Benazir Bhutto, the "Life Time Chairperson" of what she claimed to be the biggest democratic force of the country. On her death the helms of the party that she inhetreted from her father did not go to one of the loyal party leaders who guided the part while Benazir and her familyy were in self imposed exile in the UAE. The leadership of the Party was "willed" to her 18 year old son. What kind of a democracy is this? In a swift and well planned political move her son was "renamed" Bhutto and made the co-chairperson of the Party to take command after his education was completed, in the mean time her husband Asif Ali Zardari also known as Mr 10% (on account of his taking hugs kickbacks while his wife was the Prime Minister) was to be at the helm of affairs. These types of politics will never lead to a democratic country. There is a power struggle going on within the PPP which can turn bad and derail the whole political senario in the country and no matter how much Mr Zardari uses the sympathy card if he continues with his stupidities he will ultimately suffer. There was a news item in Pakistan today that Bilawal "Bhutto" Zardari the son of Benazir has just arrived in Pakistan to announce the choice of PM in the new Government, lets hope its a wise choice and doesn't lead to disintegration of the democratic process. Family run politics have to give way to a true and realistic democracy within parties before democracy can be established on a wider scale.

"Tears" - Another Bomb Blast

This is the third consecutive blogpost I have done and all three have had a mention of a suicide bomber or a blast. Enough is enough. This is getting ridiculous, with no claims of the atrocities by any terror group, no specific targets, this is just being done to induce a sense of terror in the general mases, innocent lives are being lost, we can only hope for a safer tomorrow, may God bless the departed and put some sense excuse my language into the impotent bastards targeting innocent civilians.

The heart consumes I clearly see
Every fiber of my soul and me
That’s when the pain begins to grow
And yes the tears begin to flow.

Weekend on the farm and More blasts

This weekend I figured getting away from the city might be a good idea, It turned out to be quite a lot of fun and some relaxation, came back last night and went to sleep late. This morning i woke up to the news of three suicide blasts in Lahore, 2 bombers struck the office of the FIA and 1 a school in a residential neighborhood of Lahore, over 25 dead and hundreds injured. Now I'm thinking maybe living in Pakistan is not that good an idea, but afterall people are living here and if everyone "runs" away how will things change, I came here fo a reason, I have a worst case senario backup, so what the heck, have faith in God and keep at it. Some pictures from the farm and Sialkot are posted below.

Update: There were apparently 3 explosions in the FIA building, the dead include several innocent children.

Update: The suicide attack in the residential area of model town was not at a school but rather at an advertising agency.

A Field of Mustard on the Farm

Endless fields of wheat

Standing in the Guava Orchid

Wild flowers

Holy Trinity Cathedral Sialkot

Another Suicide Bombing

After the recent suicide bombings in Rawalpindi and NWFP, a couple of suicide bombers struck closer to home today. Blowing themselves up at the Naval War College in Lahore. Seems like there is no end to this, not in too much of a mood to blog about it right now but I'm really getting sick of it.

Painter of Clouds

It was a sunny day with no clouds in sight, the birds were chirping, the bright yellow buds had blossomed into beautiful wildflowers harnessing the sun as if it would never come out again for a long time because that was an undeniable fact the sun was a rare thing in those parts. The painter was sitting on the porch of the log cabin he had recently rented from the frail old man who claimed to be a writer, a writer of dark stories most likely because the atmosphere in the village was always dark and gloomy and there could not have been much inspiration for anything else. The painter didn’t much appreciate the lively weather for he had forgotten to appreciate all things because of his past pain and sufferings. He was an outsider in the small village where everyone knew everyone else and the only companion of his empty soul was the little Sheppard boy Corsair who used to sometimes stop and talk to the painter while tending his flock. Hoping and waiting for Corsair to come he observed the scene around him with a painters mind, He tried to imagine what was making the wildflowers blossom so gaily, why most of the birds were sitting on a certain tree, why one passing villager was smiling to himself while the other was trying to hide his tears, for even though the man did not have any tears the painter could see the anguish in his eyes. Although he looked at things around him and reasoned he never did that with himself. He never gave any thought as to why he had forgotten to be happy, why he was bitter and lonely and lived a dark life in total isolation from everyone else even though he liked Corsair’s company. He never thought why he a famous painter was sitting idly waiting for dark clouds when he could paint the rare amazing landscape of light and shadow and give it a different life on his canvas.

The lone companion of the painter, Corsair, had noticed in his innocence that this strange young painter who had just moved to his village was full of darkness, but he also noticed a glint of light in the painters eyes which to him showed that not all was lost, hope was the seed the boy wanted to transform into a blossoming tree. He wanted to turn the painter of dark stormy clouds into one who could not only see and paint the light but could also transform and give a positive spin to the darkness. On that particular day when Corsair saw the painter sitting sullenly he decided that he should force the painter into submission and have him paint the amazing colors that were taking shape because of the light. He knew the painter would be reluctant but in his naïve wisdom he also knew that he was the painters only companion and the painter would think hard before isolating himself totally. The boy conspired with the elements and the sun along with the lush green grass, the tall leafy trees, the bright yellow wildflowers, the birds as well as the squirrels all conspired to provide a landscape which could be brought to life again on the painters canvas.

The painter who had forgotten how to paint light finally agreed to at least try. The painter’s hands even with all the colors and life around him could not as much as he tried paint a picture because his heart was cold and his mind turned the prettiest picture into a nightmare. It wasn’t the painter’s fault he tried but his life as far as he could remember was dark and he had forgotten all about light. He had forgotten how to paint a happy picture because the only recent recollection of any happiness that he had was time spent with Corsair who was also trying hard to push the darkness out of the painter’s life.

The painter kept trying, the boy kept trying, even the elements were curious and wanted to see the outcome of the boys effort, clouds shied away for a long time, the birds and butterflies fluttered their wings cherishing every moment of sunlight they could get. Every morning the boy would come and help the painter paint the picture he had forgotten to paint, and finally the painter finished one of his most beautiful paintings ever. The boy loved it, the bright sun set happily behind the mountains, not knowing that the happiness he had witnessed was short lived, the painter who had not seen such vibrant colors, such life and who was not used to it put the painting in his attic and told the boy never to mention it again and never to ask him to paint another one.

The boy with tears flowing out of his eyes and the heaviest heart a boy his size could have, walked away into the misty night towards the sleeping village. The elements became angered, the next morning there was no Corsair, there was no life, there was only cold howling wind, dark gray clouds and unforgiving lightning, the clouds had overpowered the sun that only last night had set smiling, and the painter with no name sat in his den, looking at the embers from the fire in his fireplace, that was fed with logs from the young tree of hope the seeds of which were planted by Corsair and which had instead of blossoming with flowers, died and become firewood.

Absence and going ons

Hey, just felt like droping in here and writing something today. Its been a while since I was here and I do not think any of the few readers that were here are there anymore, this is sort of an explanation as to where I have been for those friends who have sent me emails asking where I am. I have been in Pakistan for the past month and a half on account of several things including some problems with my business and my sister's aproaching wedding which is Inshallah soon.

Other than a few visits to my farms and some work for the coming wedding I have been relatively free and have had time to reflect on a lot of things, I have studied the option of doing a project/NGO I had always dreamed of doing in Pakistan and did some research regarding that. Visited my childhood home which brought back nostalgic memories of vacations spent there, salvaged a lot of artwork from the house which was in ruin on account of the house being shut down for the last 8 years. It seems only like yesterday that I used to run around the mango and leychee orchards and catch butterflies and fireflies from the grounds, sometimes a lifetime seems like a few days at other times a month might seem like an eternity.

I will be leaving back for Dubai inshallah end of December and then I will be writing here regularly, right now I have limited access to the internet with the house full of wedding guests, Hope to catch up with you all soon.

Independence day & Internet

I finally had internet installed in my new home yesterday and so I should be back posting soon. A happy independence day to all my Pakistani and Indian readers.

Moving and Painting

Hey everyone, I'v been a bit busy and will be for another couple of days because I'm moving into a new place, Here is the view from my new bedroom.

Also I figured I'd get some feedback from you folk, I started a new hobby in my old age, can't do the things I used to anymore, so here is my first oil painting ever that I did a couple weeks back, what do my readers think?

1. Base and starting.

2. A little progress.

3. The finished painting.

Ramblings

I recently became a year older and I was just thinking of everything thats been happening in my life, how time is or has been passing me by, of the things I have achieved, things I would like to achieve or should have achieved till now. I’ve had some dreams, some ideas of what I'd like to do, some of those have been accomplished while some have been put at the back of the closet that is my life, this closet mind you is quite messy right now and needs to be organized in a big way.

I believe in fate and destiny, I believe that whatever happens, happens for a reason, sometimes fate knocks on our door with an opportunity and says "The ball is in your court lets play tennis" fate has a court, it brings you the balls and the racket too, it might even bring along the ball boy and you say no I'm not interested in playing right now, you walk away from that opportunity, close the door on fate. On the other hand you might be wanting to challenge fate at a latter date and try to go to its clubhouse with all the equipment, it might just not be interested in playing with you no matter how much you try. You try so hard you give it so much that fate at that moment will laugh at you and say "I’ve come playing so many times and you’ve said no, lets now see how hard you can fight". That is when you have to decide if you want to keep knocking fates door until your knuckles are raw and you're left with nothing but a wounded soul or if you want to go back and wait patiently for fate to come back to you when its ready to play. It is decisions like these that pave the way of our life, sometimes the judgment can be wrong and we have to be strong enough to face our own decisions.